How much do I hate the movie "Twilight"? -- and I use the term "movie" lightly.

The short answer is: a lot.

The long answer is: a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

First off... it's a crappy movie. Not just in the aspect of plot, etc... but I mean, it's just been made in a really awful way. I know college freshmen who could do a better job at makeup and special effects. I mean, come on... you're a big Hollywood movie! Next... the acting? COME ON! I've seen better acting at the Kindergarten graduation extravaganza. These people suck. All the way across the board... But why do I hate it so much? Other than the afore-mentioned suck-factor? Hows about, I spent $4.00 on it and felt like they should pay ME after I had watched it. I can't believe they're even thinking about making a second... or, for the fear of killing myself, a third? AHHHHHHH!!! Why would you do this?!

I mean... correct me if I'm wrong... but what makes this a "good" story is the supposed love between the two main actors? I've seen divorced couples who hate each other that have more chemistry than these two.

Lets not forget the sparkly, kid-friendly, vampire revelation that allows our illustrious, bad-acting, lead to walk in the sunlight! Do you even understand the idea of Vampires? Do you?

Then there is Bella... what a shitty role-model. "I'm in a new place. I don't fit in. I fall a lot and I just want to let Edward have his way with me at the age of 16, even though every other boy in this film wants to do me." -- Seriously... the lady who wrote this drivel needs to have her writing license revoked... in a big way.

If I want fanfic, I can write my own. I want a professionally written story and movie... not this tripe... And I still want my $4.00 back.

See... I'm a vampire guy. I like Vampire movies... and this... this is not a vampire movie. This is crap. This is more than crap actually... Given $200 and a camera, I bet me and my friend, Dan, could come up with a better vampire movie than this.

This is the cinematic version of the Jonas Brothers.

If you want a good vampire movie, might I suggest the following as a better way to spend your time and money.

Blade
Underworld
Night Watch/Day Watch
The Lost Boys
The Monster Squad
Interview With a Vampire
My Best Friend Is a Vampire
Buffy The Vampire Slayer